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Don't you think today would be a good day for Donald Trump to resign?


2.01.2009

Citigroup: Fine, we'll return our freaking jet! Jerks!


Citigroup is slowly learning the reason why they can't have nice things. It's that stupid $45 billion government bailout.

After reports surfaced that Citigroup had ordered themselves up a brand new $50 million jet, lawmakers and rational people everywhere started pressuring them to cancel delivery of the Dassault Falcon 7X, arguing that buying a private plane after getting rescued by taxpayer money is too stupid to even bother talking about. Citigroup responded that a $50 million jet could help cut costs, though it failed to be the first on the planet to explain how a $50 million private jet purchase could ever possibly be considered a cost-cutting measure. Citigroup reps then went on to complain about the cancellation penalties they'll incur if they don't go through with the purchase, and when no one gave a crap executives likely just fell on the floor and burst into tears.

In the end, they canceled the jet, and now none of the thousands of Citigroup employees around the world has any idea how they're supposed to get around. Answer them that, stupid congress. Stupid taxpayers. Who's gonna drive Citigroup home tonight?

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